IT'S NATIONAL ALPACA DAY

Its national Alpaca day today.  And the Alpaca paintings in the gallery are jumping for joy. There are Alpaca competitions in the world, where the Alpaca wears a mankini and joins in on a race.  I wouldn't like to be an Alpaca bending down that's for sure.   So whats the deal?. Well find an Alpaca on youtube and make the noise, do the dance and be an Alpaca for the evening.  Make Alpaca pancakes and put some crazy music on.  Happy Alpaca day everyone
Let me know how your evening went, send some photos, send me an Alpaca. Nothing to report from the SSS.  Today the rain keeping passers by out but loved the bag of carrots on the door handle this morning.Thanks for The Alpaca photos Tracey Jane Sulivan, I hope they are not giving you too much grief on the house boat.
Oh Mr Lurve popped in great Radio voice makes me sedate.

GOOD DAY 

A mixture of days

Well even though I am surrounded by technology I am now feeling quite disorientated, not sure what day it is, I am forgetting to tick off my day in marker pen on the mattress.  Aside from this. I am loosing sight of what has been donated into the Super Sonic Shed and apologise profusely to anyone who I have not acknowledged.  Lolli your a gem, enter the cutter arts big thanks, family with Rolos .... big thumbs up.  Toby the sheep painter big thanks for amazing hippy T combo tea, he has an amazing ability to make hippy tea taste. It's a technique involving a wooden spoon and 4 t-bags combo.  Thanks guys from the water boarding at the Marina, who turned up with a bunch of bananas and big thanks to Rachel for soup. And big thanks to my film buff friend who popped in with spicy rice in a flask.  Thanks to the small bird that hopped in the bi-passed my bird cage.

Sleeping in here is really getting up my nose and yesterday Sat 19th was too surreal and trance like. Toby disappeared off into town and left tangerine dream playing on a cd. Half way through the cd it started sticking and I didn't want to leave the Super Sonic Shed to bang the top of the cd player.
I shouted out to the first passer by and he came in dived over the art booth counter, legs in the air, then boshed the cd player and solved the problem.  He quickly exited the space then gave me one last eye contact look as if to say I hope your not taking the piss.
I haven't written about Charlies angels donning pilots goggles and theatrical masks, turned up with a massive itinerary on Friday evening, involving
A spring clean
A Silence of The Lambs reenactment, with myself pacing up and down as Hannibal Lector in my long Johns
A pass the balloon with a sausage shaped balloon in between our legs and other rather naughty angles.
And a A game of twister.
Its just a good job that when they brought chips there wasn't an equal share of boiled eggs. I have not had such an intimate game of twister before.
All in all Friday night hilarious hope to see you all again.  Apparently mud wrestling next on the cards.
Today I awoke to a marathon announcement from a guy who possibly fancied himself as a compere.  He carried on talking with his amplified voice even after hundreds of joggers had whizzed past.  It seemed quite strange seeing people wondering past with foil blanket whilst I paced up and down in the SSS.
Just waiting for the singer Tracey Jane to arrive.  Shes going to sing a few songs for my birthday.
Goodnight
SUNDAY DAYTIME Involved Toby harping on about crazy paving with the odd intermittant crazed bellowing laughter.  A bird made an appearance today and hopped all the way to the supersonic shed.  I tried to entice it into my bird cage with three rich t-buscuits.  Toby dissappeared in the day and left me to listen to Tangerine dream which stuck on the cd player half way through.  There was me sat in the gallery not being able to touch the cd player going ape.  I shouted to the next passer by outside the gallery window.  A chap who looked like a pirate from Penanze stepped in dived over the counter the scarpered with a last quick piercing eye glance at me to see if I was extrapolating the urine.  Sunday evening will go down in history as being one of the best if not theee best birthday ever.  Tracey Jane Sullivan turned up and it turned out she was one of the Charles Angels from previous visits.  My head was very confused I was a part of a game that hadnt clicked into place. All the time I was thinking Tracey Jane was going to rock up and I had seen her pop videos on the internet.  And yes she did turn up but, I have already seen her masked on two previous occassions.  I was  being fooled in the nicest posible way and totally enjoyed someone else being the bafoon just for a change.  Cheeky ............ ha ha excellent .  The conversations were amazing and the fact that Tracey Jane was not in the least bit bothered about my having to slope off to the loo in a half metre proximity every two minutes was great.  Every visit to the loo resulted in big glittered love heart falling off the Supersonic Shed and I found myself having to wrestle with the love heart to make it steady and safe one too many times.

The olives cheese bread fine company and mind blowing music followed by a game a blindfolded trifle feeding was hilaruious, but too efficient.  Traceys accoustic hit me in the solar plexis, the presence of the music penetrated the super sonic shed and the plants on the gallery window cill must have been dancing their petals off.

TODAY HAS BEEN A PAIN IN THE GLASS
I nearly bailed out today , very close, was difficult. Bad hangover zero energy or enthusiasm. A friend turned up with a bunion patch and talked about supermarkets and Krishna and told me how he had walked from one supermarket to another and measured the walking distance.  Another artist friend told me about his crazy time in Manhattan and his family expreiences.  Through all the difficult btimes here I am getting something which I have never before experienced.  People turn up and tell me about their life.  Its great to be someone above a look out for traffic wardens.  I am getting some amazng stories and enjoying the fact that people feel their is a bit of an opportunity to just have a bit of a voice in some way.

Not much to report except I am enjoying Polly the parrot being here its taken on more of an identity as a hanging static theatrical prop than the real African Greys.  I havnt heard it speak yet though which is testament to my sanity levels.  I could loose the plot .. lets face it, I am in a shed.
GOODNIGHT !



SUPERSONIC SHED YESTERDAY (TODAY) AND TODAY (LATER)

YESTERDAY ALL MY TROUBLES SEEMED SO FAR AWAY

Super Sonic Shed generation game consisted of one stick of candy from a family that travelled all the way from Bedford to see me.  Slight deviation of truth this was via a funeral.  One apple, one banana, from two Irish love birds.  Loads of juice and the most obscure gift to the Super Sonic Shed was a Smarty Lamp from renowned artist Jac Queline Hammond.  The 1970s smarty lamp pre - assembled left me in  mind boggling despair... this was Rubik cube technology, I can just about switch a kettle on.  When the huge light was assembled, I chucked out the hot water bottle to down size. 

 

At night time I opened the side window in the roof and rested the lamp in the gap.  Just as I was about to doze off the lamp fell and started slowly creeping on its long lead sporadically towards my nose.  It was at the point when the curly spirally lamp was edging its way towards my face and making scratching noises against the back of the Super Sonic Shed that I realised something was wrong.  I realised that solitary confinement means you attach far more significance to inanimate objects around you.  The huge lamp very brightly lit with escaping light out of the spiral gaps, became a UFO and I was about to be abducted.  I didnt genuinly believe this, but convinced myself, amusingly, that this was happening and at the same time made it very real in my mind.

 

The music to War of the Worlds was running through my head, as the lamp creeped closer and closer towards my face.  This is the point at which I realised reality for me, was starting to change significantly.  And its only because I am viewing my experience comedically and objectively that I can keep a lock on my changing perceptions.  Knowing that there is an end date to all of this helps also.  For anyone else in confinement, I dread to think how inanimate objects, take on a personality or stronger presence.

So yes its starting to happen, I am going slightly stir crazy and whilst this is not like the film Mid Night Express, the fact that three random girls turned up last night wearing shiny silver pilot goggles, completely brought everything back to how it should be.  The three girls entered the Super Sonic Shed and I was guided through a vigorous yoga class, with deep breathing exercises.  One of the girls asked me if I have had any sex yet, this wasn't a proposition but very direct question, in a very small potent space. 

That half an hour in the Super Sonic Shed was hilarious and they are coming back as Charlies Angels on Friday and we are going to reinact Silence of the Lambs then have a 1970s disco together.
Probably have a drink or two. 
Goodnight !!



SUPERSONIC SHED DAY 10.. IS THERE A WORLD OUT THERE ?

The events of the last two days have been very interesting.  I spontaniously decided to put an advert out on facebook for a valentines date to share a meal in the Super Sonic Shed and had no idea who was going to turn up, as it was left in the hands of Latest TV to organise my date.  I was getting a  bit low on company and when the blind date arrived my eye balls popped out, travelled all the way to France, pressed themselves against the window of a kiosk at a petrol station, then bounced all the way back again. 
The date was salacious and desirable and it was well worth sprucing up the Super Sonic Shed for the romance of a life time.  Probably shouldnt reveal too much as the nights proceedings didnt all go to plan, in fact it was a disaster.  Watch one of the up and coming episodes of Latest TV to get the low down. 
I have realised some new things about life in the Supersonic Shed, if my toes touch the metal frame when I am trying to sleep, I react like a bear having a cocktail stick pricked into the end of it's nose.  Not that I have ever tried or seen this, so please don't send in letters of complaint.
There have been some recent requests for my postal address, to send parcels so its now on the homepage.  Bathroom curtain fell down today I was not a happy bunny, my penknife from the pound shop rescued the situation, unfortunately I had to pierce my zebra style bed cover with several holes to feed the camping string through.
The mattress has really had it in for me today and keeps collapsing on my head.  My back is hurting and there was spilt wine last night.  I need to have a spring clean and get the feather duster out.  Sold a painting today, jumped for joy and banged my head on the bird cage.
New donated editions to the Supersonic shed are a cosmic fluffy pink pen, that lights up when the battery is working.  And one daffodil in a neon tube.  Madeira cafe came up trumps again and a bag of food arrived from the charity Whoopsadaisy . 
It does sometimes feel strange accepting food donations when there are hungry people out there and I could just ring up to order a pizza.  But this is a real challenge and a great way to observe the powers of manifestation.  Don't want to sound like I am talking officer drivel, so wont go too deep into that one. 
I keep finding myself having a quick nostril rummage then realising I am being filmed, my personal life is getting very much mixed into this equation.  Someone came into the gallery today and the only thing he could think to say was
LOOK AT YOU !YOUR IN PRISON, WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO YOURSELF.
At first I was slightly peeved that he made an instant conclusion on my environment with judgement, but then got my head around the fact all opinions are opinions and that's all they are.  The comments and opinions are reflections of many different personalities and that's about the size of it.
Toby's trippy sheep painting has now been replaced with an alpaca and it is staring intently at me.  There is also a ram on a 50 x 50 canvas behind where the toilet is.  I  use the toilet at a different angle now as the ram keeps side eyeing me.
I think, I will use humans jumping over a gate to help me get to sleep tonight.  LATEST DEVELOPMENT
The glockenspiel makes a perfect cross legged table to rest the lap top on.

10 DAYS GONE SO FAR . 

Will I hold out ? Well that depends on whether or not the sheep stop staring at me. Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Two guys have just walked past the window debating as to whether or not I am real.  I scratched my right ear just to help them out.

Goodnight